What do you do all day?

So I've never been asked this question directly, but it is the most insensitive question for a SAHM. I do what you pay daycare workers big bucks to do. My days are a mixed bag of tricks and treats. My minions who I shall refer to as thing 1 (2 years old) and thing 2 (8 months) for this exercise dictate what I do during most of the day. I won't bore you with diaper changes or potty runs, those too are also a mixed bag. Somehow I manage to use the bathroom and eat, rarely alone but ya know...mixed bag.

7:45 AM (Thing 2) Turns over smiling and let mom know it's time to get up
8:00 AM (Thing 1) Runs into mom's room and immediately jump into bed with her
8:15 AM Place thing 2 in his jumper, let thing 1 run around as I shower and dress
8:30 AM (Yes, my shower has to be this short) Change thing 1 and thing 2 into clothes, that will inevitably get dirty or come off for some reason during the course of the day
8:45 - 9:30 AM Breakfast. Thing 1 usually eats oatmeal but she's been refusing that those days so I have to get creative. Thing 2 is trying to decide if he should eat the food placed on his tray or throw it on the floor for mommy to clean up. Surprise, it's on the floor!
9:30 - 10:00 AM Clean Kitchen (put away dishes, wipe counter, put a load of clothes in)
(11:30 AM Thing 1 falls asleep for 20 mins...this is long enough for me to get thing 2 lunch/snack)
10:00 - 12:00 Errands (grocery store, Target, Costco...Starbucks) or Activity of the day. Wrangling 2 children under 3 in any store requires patience and time. If you don't have either, this is a bad idea.
12:00 - 2:00 PM Free play...pretty much every kid for themselves. Complete chaos. We are lucky enough to have a play room, which is kid-proof, so it's not as bad it could be. Also I allow for 30 mins before nap time to have thing 2 clean up. 
2:00 - 3:30 PM (if i'm lucky 4) Thing 2 goes down for a nap, if I'm lucky thing 1 will take a nap also. Which gives the time to make my most important decision of the day: Do a chore? Take a nap? Watch tv?
4:00 - 6:00 PM Free Play and dinner prep. Sometimes I wait until my husband gets home at 6:30 to finish dinner because it's easier that way. Trust me.
6:00 - 8:00 PM Finish dinner, do the dishes, clean kitchen, fold clothes, put away clothes (yes again, I know, I don't know how it stays dirty either)
8:20 - 9:00 Bath and bedtime for thing 1 and thing 2
9:00 - 9:30 PM Finish cleaning kitchen (yes, now it's done!), pick up toys, clothes and random other artifacts
10:00 - 10:40 PM Sit down, turn on computer. Decide if I would like to blog or not. Get on Pinterest. Scroll through Instagram.
10:40 - 11:00 Thing 2 is ready to nurse.
11:00 - 11:30 Decide to blog...
11:30 - 11:50 Need to get to bed...continues to blog, read Pinterest, scroll through instagram...will regret in the morning
12:00 Thing 2 ready to nurse again...so I decide it's time to go to bed.

As I read this I chuckle because I wish the day was this predictable. Life as a stay at home mom is rarely predictable. Each day brings new challenges and new developments. These little beings change so fast, so I'm just enjoying the ride.

**In the future if the question comes up I have somewhere to direct people.